Mother’s Day is around the corner and the world is gearing up to celebrate and salute all forms of motherhood. But the day could be painful and isolating for women fighting infertility issues.
Not being able to conceive normally could be frustrating for a woman yearning to become a mother. It pulls her down both emotionally and physically when fertility treatments fail to yield results. Anurama Suresh, an engineer-turned-mind coach, shares with LeadNOW how a positive mindset can help women who are unable to conceive.
Simple formula for healthy pregnancy
Anurama offers a simple formula: “a healthy body + a healthy mind = successful pregnancy.” The medical treatments for the body are important but the mind plays a far greater role than we imagine, she says. If the mind is not in acceptance of the fertility treatments, the body delays responding, points out Anurama, an internationally certified master NLP practitioner (Neuro Linguistic Programming is an approach to communication, personal development and psychotherapy.)
She says several women go through difficult pregnancies primarily due to their emotional states. They require a lot of emotional support and guidance before conception and during pregnancy. When a woman faces repeated miscarriages or fertility treatment failures, she faces chronic loneliness, which, in turn, results in depression.
To help women maintain a positive mindset before conception and through their pregnancies, Anurama founded Shreehi, meaning Divine Mother in Sanskrit, in 2016 with a team of four women NLP practitioners.
“During these mind coaching and training sessions we observed that our clients have a conscious control over their minds. Once the mind is filled with positive emotions and a complete acceptance for life, the body beautifully responds for conception,” she explains.
Insecurities and inner fears act as mental blocks
Swetha (name changed), a lecturer, had undergone two IUI (intrauterine insemination) procedures before approaching Shreehi. She had quit her job to undergo the fertility treatment procedures but those didn’t work. It was during the mind coaching sessions at Shreehi that Swetha understood the deep insecurities within her and started working on her relationship with her husband and in-laws. It took just 3 months for Swetha to conceive naturally after the coaching sessions, says Anurama.
Similarly, Rajni (name changed), who works with a multinational company, was unable to lead a happy married life due several mind blocks. Although her husband was supportive, Rajni avoided discussing pregnancy whenever he brought it up. Finally, Rajni's husband contacted Shreehi. During the very first session itself Rajni opened up and over consecutive coaching sessions, revealed her inner fears about sex. She had faced a lot of body shaming in her college days, which made her believe she looked manly. With guidance, Rajni worked hard to overcome this and eventually conceived naturally.
Welcome change in the male mindset
Anurama says when it comes to pregnancy and infertility-related issues, women have always borne the brunt in India. But there is a welcome change in men nowadays in dealing with these issues. “We are particular that husbands are a part of our coaching sessions. During these sessions men find it easy to relax and share their issues. Within a few sessions itself we notice a willingness in them to support their wives wholeheartedly,” she says.
It is generally difficult for men to open up about deep-rooted emotional issues, Anurama says, citing the case of Anita (name changed), a project manager. Here the problem lay with her husband, Rohit (name changed). He had erectile dysfunction and had not discussed it with Anita before their wedding. In the initial months of the marriage, Anita was keen on divorcing him.
Recommended by a friend, Anita and Rohit had approached Shreehi. While going through the sessions, Rohit realized the deep resentment he was holding against his parents. Highly strict parenting and performance pressure had affected him a lot. He was unable to let go of this resentment. Shreehi worked at various levels with him to make him forgive his parents. Gradually, his mind relaxed, which, in turn, helped his physical condition. Now they have a lovely eight-month-old daughter, says Anurama, who is also a Arhatic yoga practitioner and Gestalt therapist (It is a client-centered approach to psychotherapy.)
Adopting a successful methodology
Of the 82 couples who have approached Shreehi so far, 76 have been successful in conceiving and having healthy babies, says Anurama. “We follow an outcome-based coaching methodology with its core as non-judgemental coaching space,” she explains.
The framework can be used for any person, irrespective of age or gender. “We have also used this framework successfully for coaching corporate executives, adolescent kids and parents,” she says.
(Shreehi was incubated at NSRCEL, IIM Bangalore, for 15 months. It was among the Top 15 women startup companies to be incubated in 2016-17. Apart from relationship coaching sessions and fertility mind coaching sessions, Shreehi also conducts corporate training programs. Anurama has been in the field of Executive Coaching and Life Coaching since 2010.)
A healthy and positive mind is the key to solving infertility issues, says mind coach Anurama Suresh
By: Geethalakshmi R